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How to Stay Positive during Difficult Times
It’s not always easy to stay positive in difficult situations, but it is possible.
Even people with seemingly perfect lives experience difficult times. But when life spins out of control our emotional state doesn’t have to completely deteriorate with it.
Here are 5 practical tips to maintain an optimal state of mind during difficult times.
1) Practice Detachment from from your Surroundings
It is easy to feel positive when something good happens in our environment, and it is natural to feel bad when something bad happens.
We have been conditioned to respond directly to our physical surroundings.
The problem with this is not everything that happens is “good.”
And if you repeatedly respond this way you are at the mercy of an unpredictable environment.
It is possible to train yourself to feel good even when “bad” things are happening, but first you must tell yourself that how you feel is a choice.
Start with the “Small” things
It is easier to start with something small. For instance, I am a waitress and it is easy to be bummed when the tips are not great.
I just make a decision when I come to work that I am going to be happy no matter what kind of tips I get.
Doing this makes it easier to stay positive when something more extreme happens, because you have trained yourself to learn how to feel outside of what is happening in the outside world.
The more you practice changing your state deliberately, the more control you have during difficult situations.
This starts with an intention.
Practice soothing yourself during small disappointments.
Maybe the barista under-poured your 5 dollar latte, or someone cut you off in traffic.
Tell yourself that you are capable of feeling good even when things are not going perfectly, and eventually you will gain a better control of your emotions in more severe situations.
The first time I really practiced feeling good outside of my situation was when I came across Abraham Hicks
My life was far from ideal. I was completely broke and in a horrible relationship. I worked all day everyday but still never had enough money to pay all my bills.
On top of that I had no friends where I lived and spent a lot of time alone, with no one I could really talk to.
My day to day life was a struggle and I rarely felt any peace, but I decided to sit back and genuinely ask myself how I wanted to feel.
I decided that I would work on conjuring a state outside of my physical circumstance because I could not see any way outside of my situation.
There are several tools to do this but using the Abraham Hicks exercise, “what would it feel like” worked the best for me.
I asked myself how I would feel if I had more time to do things I wanted to do. I made it my mission to feel good even though my life was extremely difficult.
Eventually I was able to experience states of mind outside of my environment. I still employ that skill daily and it has helped me during difficult circumstances.
2) Meditation
Meditation is a great way to find relief from difficult circumstances.
Positive thinking alone is not always effective in extremely difficult situations.
Learning how to meditate can help to rewire the brain to new feelings.
Two ways to Practice Meditation
- Transcendental:
During this type of meditation, the objective is to clear the mind of all thoughts.
Focusing on a single sound, such as an air conditioning or the sound of your breath. I sometimes listen to frequencies on you tube.
2) Guided
The purpose of guided meditation is to achieve an optimate state of mind through imagery.
There are many guided meditations on you tube. I personally find Joe Dispenza’s Guided meditations the most effective.
I recommend trying to out both types of meditations.
Important note: Meditation is a skill that requires practice. It often takes a few attempts to achieve a meditative state.
3) Stop Feeling Guilty for not Partaking in other People’s Suffering
If your negative situation includes someone else, feelings of guilt can make it hard to be positive.
This is especially true of highly empathic people.
We are taught that it is selfish to feel good when someone else is suffering. However, it is important to know that feeling positive doesn’t mean you don’t care or want to help someone else.
Feeling bad won’t help someone else’s situation. You will actually be of more value if you can maintain a positive state of mind.
4) Focus on what is Working out
Take a mental break from the problem and focus on what is working out.
If you are going through a difficult time, chances are you have been banging trying to find a solution to no avail.
Either there is nothing you can do or the solution is eluding you because you are so focused on the problem.
Taking a mental break from the problem can put you in a more optimized state.
Start a gratitude journal to record all of the things that are working out in your life. Even in the most difficult situation it is possible to find something that isn’t completely horrible.
This may seem simple but it can have profound results.
5) Try to Find the good in the Situation
This can be very hard to find the good in difficult situations, but it is worth a try.
To do this, tell yourself that the difficult situation is a good thing, even if you are not sure how.
Maybe short term it is hard to see any benefit in the situation, but that doesn’t mean that there isn’t any.
One of my favorite gurus, Bashar, explains that giving a positive meaning to difficult situations can actually change the outcome.
Being positive does not prevent difficult situations from ever occurring, but it does make life easier to navigate.
While it is not always easy to feel positive in negative situations, it is possible.
It starts with an intention to try to feel positive despite what is going on in your environment.
I have found that practicing feeling positive in mildly difficult situations helps to maintain a higher state when things are more difficult.
Also, it is ok to not always feel good. Feeling bad about feeling negative does not help anything!
Just know that doing your best to feel positive is the first step in dealing with difficult situations.
Need some Guidance in your journey….
I am a lifecoach specializing in happiness and life purpose.
Because I believe everyone needs and goals are different I offer as little or as many sessions as needed.
For a free 15 minute consultation e-mail me at aglassofcheri@gmail.com
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